this was just so heavy on my heart this morning, i had to get it out...
right now, i'd say that i'm in the process of learning how to truly love people...MYSELF, my family, friends, strangers, even God. but all my interactions are beginning to feel so forced...i'm being more honest, but the rest of my life just feels so inauthentic. it makes me not want to hang around anyone. really, i just feel like fading away sometimes. was it all a lie? how do i know which relationships are for real, and which ones weren't? do i keep them all or do i let them go...is it even an all or nothing deal??? this is just one more thing i don't have an answer to...and it's frustrating...disheartening...but more than anything, it's just lonely.
i feel so...not like myself. and idk who i am or who i'm supposed to be......
Fading into oblivion is never good. Love the ones who love you back. That's the way forward.
ReplyDelete