unfinished.

i left.
left as fast as my fear could carry me.
not knowing if i'd ever return.
i know you think it's easy for me to turn and run
having done it before, there's really
nothing left to learn
but the pain of not being here still burns
in my chest
at least the void's filled with something right?
and yet, i'm still afraid
that fear takes up even more space inside
and i'm afraid that terror is evident with every blink of my eyes
as the tears stream out, suffocating each breath
my lungs supply
i'm afraid, you see, because i'm unsure of where my loyalty lies
and with all the thoughts
and all the feelings
i'm afraid of being betrayed by what lies inside
my mind
so i left.
and i don't know when i'll be back
as each moment passes i still wonder
did i do good this time,
did i make the right choice?
or am i making things worse for the sake
of gaining my voice...?